I have been selfish: I like the cooling effect on my skin of their colder weather. I don't mind the huffing and puffing if I can earn some visible and actual altitude. I enjoy steep fast descents at the end of my journeys. Sometimes they shine with a lustrous sheen when they are covered in granite or lava. They can also be multicolored and unstable when they are made of sandstone. In the tropics, they are massive and oftentimes you discover a rich mineral red under all that vast vegetable greenery. Most of all, I like them when they are jagged and covered with snow. I do love my mountains!

It happened at the base of Headwall at Squaw Valley, one on my favorite California ski resorts. I had already cleared what is considered to be the most difficult part of the run and was cruising from a set of moguls to another one over un-groomed terrain. Apparently I was going too fast and landed improperly on a mogul. I was skiing by myself but I was on my annual All Boys Trip (ABT). Most of the guys on the ABT went to UC Irvine and all we seem to have in common is that we were part of a Team, Association or Club as in rowing, sailing, surfing and of course skiing. I was found by one of my friends. I knew I was in trouble when I couldn't move my legs. My friend knew I wasn't playing one of my usual practical jokes when I asked him to remove the snow from my mouth so I could breathe more easily. I later learned that my ABT friends rallied for me while I was in the Intensive Care Unit; Somehow that makes me extremely happy.

I was rescued off the mountain by the great guys and gals of the Squaw Valley Ski Patrol. According to them, I was the worst accident of that year. My wife and I had to fill innumerable insurance forms and had to call them to get some needed paperwork. I was glad to discover that one of the injured guys still works for this outfit handling insurance paperwork. I was airlifted by helicopter from the mountain and ended up in Reno’s Renown Hospital. I had burst my C5 cervical vertebrae. C3, C4 and C5 had to be fused together in order for me to survive my injury. Five days later, as a result of this surgery, I suffered a cerebellum clot which naturally caused a stroke. That cerebellum clot made my brain too inflamed and it was too close to my stem cell. I had to have another surgery to remove all the necrotic tissue. A couple of tubes were implanted on top of my head to relieve most of the pressure. To this day, I am convinced that most of my physical problems have to do with the stroke and not the original accident as I was fooling around with my ABT friends after the skiing misfortune. After recuperating from my stroke for almost a month, Renown couldn't do anything else for me. My wonderful wife chose to transfer me to Colorado's Craig Hospital where I spent almost four months recuperating from my injuries. I became what is known as an incomplete paraplegic. Prior to this ski accident, I have never been to a hospital, not even for stitches. I had a bad childhood bout with asthma but that improved with lots of strange tropical home remedies and disappeared with relentless adolescent aerobic sports.

I do remember the original ski accident and the initial days at Renown but I have to admit that I don't remember my days after the stroke and the early days at Craig. Everyone tells me that's for the best! Family and friends came to visit me during this time. Unfortunately, I do not remember any of this. I knew I had suffered a serious accident when I learned that my mother and sister had visited me in the US. I do remember my aunt and cousin visiting me later while I was in recuperating in Colorado, where three angelical women took care of me at Craig: My speech therapist who gave me the ability to eat and talk again; My physical therapist who showed me how difficult it would be to gain some strength again; And my occupational therapist (OT) who showed my wife and I how to make everyday life a little easier. My OT also knew what was to come: The only place where I still have pain is in my hands and wrists. I have worn all kind of splints on my elbows and forearms but the Dynasplint seem to work the best. Fortunately, I don't have to do serial casting anymore.

Why did this happen to me? If you are a good Christian you have to believe that “God won't give you more than you can handle” If you are into Eastern religions you understand the concepts of reincarnation and karma —Who knows what bad deeds I did in past lives or this one. I just don't remember— I do tend to think like my mother, it is all a matter of statistics; If you ski and you ski fast you are going to get hurt about 16% of the time. I happened to fall in that percentage on that particular date. That date was Friday the 13th, March 2009. I am not a superstitious person and I like to think that I learn from all my experiences. For example, I have learned that there's a maximum of three Friday the 13th’s in one particular year. 2009 happened to be one of those. Most buildings in the US don't have a 13th floor because of that superstition. There is even a name for this phobia which is friggatriskaidekaphobia.

On Memorial weekend, just two months away from my accident, I was supposed to take my son backcountry skiing to Shasta Mountain in northern California. Like most kids, my son learned how to ski early and then moved on to snowboarding. He decided to get good at skiing so that he could go into the backcountry with me. We had taken avalanche courses together and I had even chosen backcountry gear. We had gone on a few snow backcountry outings but not overnight yet. I had decided to get a guide, not only to be sure to make it to the top but also to aid in case of any emergencies. Shasta has the longest run in the lower 48 States, in the spring when corn snow is available. I wasn’t looking for the warmer temperatures of spring but wanted to ski this beautiful corn snow having tried some dirty patches in the Mammoth Lakes area.

I don't know if I'll ever make it to Shasta Mountain for spring skiing but I miss not being more available to my daughter and not teaching her a couple of adult skills. She never learned how to drive stick shift and off-road like my son learned from me. I have given her what seems to be an egotistical project that may take her ten years to complete: To drive at least a couple of days of the Baja 1000 course. Whether we drive on a sponsored truck or a dune buggy, slapped from an old Mexican VW that I should be able to afford, it's entirely up to her.

Most of the time I feel like a cross between a baby and a circus performer. But once in a while I feel like I am accepting an Oscar or I am a talking head on CNN; Except there will not be any unexpected  music or an annoying clock buzzard if I run out of time. As a matter-of-fact, one of the tags for this post is ramble, which means I can jump from theme to theme and take all the necessary time and space in apparent disorganization; I will thank my wife of almost 30 years because without her love and attention I would not be alive. We have known each other for more than those 30 years and our marriage and love for each other is one constant that I hope never changes in my life. This woman is the Yin to my Yang.

Some great friends threw me a fundraiser. Others decided to cook for me and my family. Still others created an e-group to keep their thoughts and prayers coming my way. Many came to visit me at Reno, Denver or my home in Southern California. As previously described, I may have forgotten some of these visits but I have an impatient lifetime to repay all of this kindness (Repay: What a wonderful English word, sometimes it doesn't involve money).

My boss, who I also consider a friend, has been greatly instrumental in my recuperation. Not only did he visit me in Reno, he has also made sure that I keep current with all the technologies used by our company. Physical recuperation from my injuries is a great challenge but improving mental agility is just as difficult. It goes back to one of our initial meetings when we founded the company. I wanted licensing fees for software I had written and he just didn't have the money. We reached an impasse after an hour of negotiations, the dealmaker (who also turned into a great friend) walked out of the room to take a personal call. When the flabbergasted dealmaker returned, my boss and I had an agreement in place; I had explained to him how Hernán Cortés set about to conquer one of the greatest civilizations of the Americas: the Aztecs. Cortés ordered for his ships to be burned. Him, his sailors and soldiers would perish in their enterprise or be successful in their conquest; There was no going back to Spain! I hope my boss takes me on his next expedition; I know he’ll understand if I really need to go back to Spain.

I am currently going to Project Walk twice a week for a couple of hours each visit for some rigorous exercises with young, enthusiastic, knowledgeable therapists. We address one of my principal goals which is to walk again. I also go to a hand therapist and although he got rid of excruciating pain in my forearms, I still have to deal with my hands and wrists and the progress is slower. I love to get into the ocean and have done so thanks to Wheels2Water and LiifeRollsOn. I have started going again for aquatics therapy, once a week and getting in the pool is one of my favorite activities. I recently started some hippotherapy and that, of course, always puts a smile on my face. What is great about hippotherapy is that not about strength; it's all about balance. Supposedly, a horse and a human gait are very similar although we clearly do not run as fast.

I see a physiatrist (watch the spelling) every four to six months. She is a woman doctor and very knowledgeable with my type of injury. She recommends new therapies for me to try and approves my current and future goals. She is always a joy to visit. I also see an excellent urologist with the same frequency. She also happens to be a woman doctor and specializes in my type of injury. I have suffered several urinary tract infections (UTIs) including two that landed me in the hospital again for several days. I have become very hygienic and deadly afraid of UTIs. As part of their drug protocol, Craig Hospital prescribed an antidepressant. Most people suffer from a depressive episode as a result of my type of injury. That has not happened to me yet. Nevertheless, I must acknowledge that I am totally obsessed with time. I am not talking about just keeping appointments and meeting deadlines. I am talking about the natural progression of time. Time may be a man-made artifact but I believe it is real. I guess it is all relative.

There is a group of people, nurses and caregivers, that make everyday life possible and easier for the rest of us. Most of the time they are used to dealing with an aging population and maybe someone not as demanding. One always thinks that most of them need training to be able to adjust to one’s requirements but it is usually the other way around. They may have their own dreams and aspirations and sometimes they do not involve caregiving. What is certain is that these human beings are full of compassion.

I have to admit that I did not see everyone that I have ever known and passed away, waiting for me with a big smile by some pearly gates; My whole life did not flash by me in seconds during my accident; A bright light did not guide me; A booming voice did not tell me to go back and complete my work; 80,000 servants and 72 virgins did not anticipate my arrival; I did not perceive blissful nothingness. But when it counted, I was painfully aware that family, friends and total strangers cared for my well being and that makes all the difference in this world.

The other tag that I am applying to this post is SCI. I wished it stood for the Science Channel; it stands for Spinal Cord Injury.

Labels: ramble, SCI